Soul-Deep Security

I remember where I was when it happened.

I remember the day that I realized I was insecure.

There had been heavy emotions and anxiety in several different areas of my life and I could not figure out why I was feeling the way I was feeling. I was sitting on my floor asking God to help me sort out my emotions and that’s when it hit me like a ton of bricks.”I’m insecure. I really think I’m insecure. I think all of these issues are rooting from insecurity.” 

I couldn’t believe it. I thought I was pretty confident. “Me? Insecure? No way.” It took me a long time to come to terms with the fact that this was true. And what I didn’t realize was that the roots of this insecurity had planted themselves deep. From that moment forward my eyes were opened wide to the effects and depths of my insecurity. These roots had interwoven themselves into every area of my life and were slowly strangling me.

I had to have success in school and when I failed I felt lesser. I wanted everyone to like me; the thought of someone not liking me was close to devastating. I compared and felt threatened by other successful people. I obsessed over conversations hoping that so and so wasn’t mad at me. I stressed over my image. I struggled with trust. I put unrealistic expectations on people and was upset and hurt when they weren’t met. The list could go on.

…maybe you’re like me and struggled/struggle with some of these things. There is a good possibility that these issues could be stemming from deep roots of insecurity. I know one of the hardest things for me was just admitting that I was insecure. I get it, everyone wants to be seen as confident; insecurity is such an unattractive trait. But let me tell you, realizing and admitting that you have an insecurity problem is the first step to real freedom, healing, and soul-deep security. Praise God for opening our eyes to our own sin!!

Some of us think that if we can just get better grades or make more money, then we will be secure and happy. Others think that if we can just be a little bit thinner and have better hair then we will feel secure about ourselves. Yet others of us think that if we can just have the best personality and get the most instagram likes then we will be secure.

Goodness, y’all. We have to WAKE UP. That is not security. That is not beauty. That is not success. And none of those things will satisfy. Sure those things may put a temporary band-aid over the wound of insecurity, but none of them will ever fix the core issue. We have completely misplaced our security.

So if we realize we have these insecurity problems, where do we go from here? Let’s turn to scripture. We see over and over again who we are in Christ, (chosen, beloved, daughter, bride, holy, set apart, co-heirs, beautiful), we see over and over again how much He loves us, and we also see who God is and what He has done. God is a God of redemption, restoration, and transformation. It is His will that we walk our days in full dignity and security. The blood of Jesus has washed away every sin and has redefined who we are. We are set free from all sins; they can no longer enslave us…this includes insecurity. We are FREE, friends. We have to stop believing the lies of the enemy. Satan seeks to kill, steal, and destroy, and that is exactly what we are letting him do when we believe his lies. We have to totally retrain our minds and thoughts; tearing down the old walls plastered with falsity and start building the new walls that are saturated with truth.

I don’t know about you, but I know that insecurity is miserable and disgusting. It’s a terrible friend and it needs to go. Since the day a few years ago that my eyes were opened to my own instability and sin, the Lord has moved and healed and transformed in so many ways. My heart and soul have come a long way, PRAISE JESUS. But there is still a ways to go on the quest for soul-deep security. I don’t know where you are on your journey, but I want us to fight this giant-sized battle, tooth and nail, together. No more sitting back and hoping we will wake up one day and be secure. This is not an overnight change, it’s going to take some work. But guess what? Where we are weak, He is strong (2 Corinthians 12:9-10), and we can do all things through his strength. We have to daily clothe ourselves and fill our minds with TRUTH of who we are, who God is, and what He has done for us. Memorize, read, pray, and repeat. I would be honored if you would join me ( me, text me, FB message, whatever…Lets do this together!) as we fight this thing to the death and find soul-deep security.

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